Tuesday ...

    Christmas was quiet here.  Church in the morning.  Charlie was gifted a new snuggle bed from the neighbor's across the street whose German Shepherd puppy quickly outgrew it.  He loves it, and so does Gracie, so I imagine there will be some disagreeing over whose it is.

   I've been waiting on ordered craft supplies to finish a few things here and there before posting before and after photos.

   In the meantime, I've been fighting insomnia the last few weeks. At one point up I was awake for over 24 hours, and just unable to get any rest.   Some of it, in the beginning, was due to being sick and coughing all night, but that has gone away. Trying to sleep on my back to breathe easier and cough less made me have nightmares of my ex-husbands (sleeping on my back has always given me nightmares).  I've stopped drinking coffee the last few days which seems to have helped a little.  Getting my mind to be fully quiet and relaxed is part of the problem, and I'm looking into healthy herbal options.

   More soon ...

Monday ...

     When my mother was alive, she would always send holiday or birthday cards and gifts with strict instructions on the outside that I was NOT to open them until the appointed date.  

     Of course, since I'm a bit of a smart-donkey at times (okay, full disclosure, most of the time not "at times.") I would respond that since I had no adult supervision, I would do whatever I wanted, which meant ripping them open the day they arrived.

    I still hold to that life principal, however, when I saw this sign, I decided that it would be the one "rule" I needed to adhere to.  It is now mounted on the inside of my kitchen door which leads to my outside porch.

    I love it.

    I sufficiently conquered my cold over the weekend to attend church yesterday morning, and our children's Christmas play last night.  It was wonderful, and the play was held two nights in a row because we had 95 children participating and wanted to give everyone a chance to shine (and audition as future stand-up comedians, of which there were quite a few). 

     I don't think I've been to a children's play since performing in them in elementary school in the early 70's (I was the unfortunate performer one Thanksgiving who had to sit in the audience and stand up at a certain point to shout "Yes!  But what does that have to do with Thanksgiving today?"  It was traumatic, trust me.  One teacher nearly yanked my arm out of the socket trying to get me to sit down and hush!).  

    One of the items my sister recently sent me from Mom's apartment is this village and train set that I remember from my childhood in Germany.  I was thrilled to get it and may find a place to keep it out year-round.

    I found some cute little Christmas baubles at the dollar store, and quickly made some snow globe earrings using Kosher salt, a little bit of silver glitter dust, and snips from my juniper wreath.    

    I'm also working on restoring a box my Aunt Linda made for my parents.  There used to be a verse written on the top of it that has faded with time, and so I want to put it back on.  Photos of that project later since I have botched it and now need to figure out how to fix it.  My handwriting is not as graceful as Aunt Linda's was.

    The week will be another busy one.  I'm picking up a few extra hours from tonight until Wednesday night to make up for the half-day off we are being forced to take on Thursday.  Tomorrow night is the virtual office Christmas party; Wednesday night will be Bible Study; Thursday night will be a movie with the kids at church to see the latest [2018] remake of the Grinch; Friday night Charlie and I will be scanning the skies for Santa's sleigh ~ actually probably sipping gluhwein and watching dysfunctional family Christmas movies (my favorites!!!).  Some domestic goddess tasks thrown in the mix here and there, and maybe some singing of Christmas carols at the top of my lungs until Charlie joins in.

    May you have a beautiful holiday season filled with lots of laughter!

Quilts and pickles ...

Click images to enlarge

   I got some woodcraft boards a few weeks ago and after a delay in getting the fabric I wanted, I went with a Plan B.  More variety, but a little disappointing since I'd had my heart set on a turquoise and brown color scheme.

   I made one board with a 4th of July theme, but wish now I'd painted the back of it white.  I may do it after the fact with a whitewash and sand the whole thing to give it a rustic look.

 

   This one I did at about 4a this morning after coughing and nightmares woke me.  I like that it is a subtle color scheme and pattern.

    A week or two ago I won a contest on Instagram from the German Consulate General in Atlanta.  Today, my prize package arrived.  A gluhwein gift box with two mugs, a bottle of spice mix, sugar, two sugar spoons for flaming rum-soaked cubes (really authentic recipe!), and Lebkuchen cookies.  I also won a yodeling pickle ornament.

   This pickle.  Oh. My. Gosh.  I love it.  Altho after it yodeled at me about five times in a row when I kept getting up and walking past the tree it felt a little pervy and I had to turn it off.  But it will be loads of fun if I ever have company in the house.  I might have to keep it on the tree all year!

Wednesday~ish ...

Click images to enlarge

    Tonight is the Christmas dinner at church, and I'm going to have to miss it.  I've caught another cold, this time with a fever.  Not sure if that makes it the flu or just another virus, but I don't like to share when I'm sluffing off bugs with the fever.  I'm super disappointed, but just trying to do my part to limit the spread.  I think I caught it at last week's music concert at the library since Nancy is also sick now  ~ someone attending was coughing quite a bit and not wearing a mask.

    I will also miss out on another art class tomorrow night, this one for block print gift tags, and again, I'm bummed.  I wanted to learn how to make them because I think I will be making Christmas cards by hand next year instead of buying them.  Perhaps another time, or a tutorial on Pinterest or YouTube.

   I'm not working today, which is sort of a good thing.  By the time I got off the phone yesterday afternoon, I could barely speak without choking and did not get more than 4 hours of sleep last night because of my coughing and choking.  I may have to sleep sitting up tonight.

   Today is mostly being spent on the sofa, sipping hot organic Throat Coat tea, taking elderberry syrup, vitamin C, and catching up on things that don't require me to go outside or be around other people.  Laundry.  Dishes (hot water was out four days last week).  Craft ideas.

    I experimented with some air dry modeling clay to make some Springerle ornaments with anise seed on the back of them.  I'm not sure I like how they came out just yet because the design is hard to see, and while they smell good, they are still soft and a little plain (kinda like the cookies, which was the whole idea, but I could have made them a little thicker to show the design more)

.  I put light brown watercolor paint on them just to make them less white, and thought about coloring the design, but didn't like that because it made them not resemble the cookies.  I will probably get some more clay, the kind that has to bake dry and try again.

     I've also been trying some ideas for turning this year's cards into next year's tree ornaments, and have two possible designs.

     But I think right now I hear a nap calling my name ...

Tis the season ... for cookies!!!

Click images to enlarge.

   Tonight, will be the women's ministry Christmas cookie exchange and fellowship.

    Monday and Tuesday this past week, I made German Springerle cookies [< click the link there for recipe].  I'd found several that my mom had written, but the one I found online was the best sounding one (and best tasting!).   It was a bit of a learning experience since I hadn't made them in almost 50 years.  My brand-new hand mixer died 20 minutes into the process, so I went old school making them by hand the way my grandmother and mother taught me.  It brought back so many wonderful memories of times with both of them, and of Germany.  I wish I'd been making them for the past five decades of Christmases and will make sure they are a part of every Christmas forward.

    I was able to use my handmade French rolling pin [< click the link there to buy one for yourself!] that was gifted to me earlier this year from a couple of angels (one named Amy!), and the Springerle rolling pin that I purchased on my 2007 Rhine Holiday Markets cruise [< click the link there to book a cruise for next Christmas!].  (these are not affiliate links and I'm not paid for promoting them, I just love Amy and UniWorld cruises!)

   I also wanted to make Spritz butter cookies and use my decorative cookie press but had a hankering for adding cranberries to the batter for a little more festive flavoring.  Two of my pastry chef slash baker mentors (Nancy & Deb) wisely advised that cranberries probably would not be compatible with the cookie press, and so they became drop cookies instead.  Not as pretty as most Christmas cookies, but what they lack in looks they make up for in flavor.

    Fortunately, I have enough ingredients to make them again without the cranberries and using my cookie press, but not the upper arm strength to properly "cream" and beat them into "light and fluffy" submission.  Perhaps next week when I can exchange the mixer or (dream on) purchase a standing mixer with a dough paddle also.

Cranberry Cheesecake Butter Cookies (a Cindi creation) This recipe made about 45 cookies; however, I cannot confirm or deny that all 45 made it to the exchange on Friday.

• 2 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
• 1 cup butter
• 1 3oz package softened cream cheese
• 1 cup sugar (I used vanilla sugar that I made several months ago with vanilla beans)
• 1 egg yolk (I actually used two because the first egg open had a tiny yolk!)
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1 teaspoon orange zest (I used fresh lemon zest)
• 1 cup chopped dried cranberries (OPTIONAL)

1. Preheat oven to 350F degrees.  
2. Sift together the first three dry ingredients (flour, salt, cinnamon). 
3. In a separate larger bowl, cream together butter and softened cream cheese (and this was when I wished I hadn't killed the hand mixer!)
4. Add sugar & egg yolk/s, beat until light and fluffy (ditto above)
5. Stir in vanilla & zest.
6. Gradually add in dry ingredients.
7. If you are not adding dried cranberries, fill the cookie press and press cookies out onto an ungreased cookie sheet (I always bake mine on parchment paper).  If you are adding dried cranberries, I would spoon drop them onto the sheet.
8. Bake 12-15 minutes or until golden (I baked mine for 15 minutes on the top rack in the oven.  I didn't want them to get scorched bottoms.)
9. Remove at once from hot sheet onto cooling racks.

A Christmas Concert

Gabriel's Message ~ harp solo

   Last night I attended a concert of music from the Middle Ages and early American history.  It was held at the local library and consisted of music from instruments of those times:  harps, concertina, organetto, French horn, and guitar.  Plus the beautiful baritone of a gentleman singing Ave Maria.  I've added short clips here from the concert, but first a little about the organetto.

   This one was made in Germany from "bogwood" ~ wood that had fallen into a bog a few thousand years ago and stayed there until it was found.  The rich dark color is from the bog.  It has baffles on one side of it which you will see in the video clip, metal pipes, and a small keyboard.

    The harps were Celtic harps with leavers to adjust the tone of the cords, and the concertina is almost like a small accordion.

    Musicians were Leah & Rodger Trent on the harp, concertina, and organetto.  [click here for a link to the website to find out about ordering CDs of their music].  They were joined by Briane Turley who sang baritone.

    I didn't get clips of the French horn, guitar, or the gentleman who sang tenor.  I was trying not to be too obvious with my camera, which is why I also didn't get very long clips.  The concert was a little over an hour, but it was heavenly.

Corde Natus Est ~ (a Gregorian chant) on organetto

Breath of Heaven ~ harp duet

Cold Frosty Morning ~ concertina & harp

Carol of the Bells ~ harp duet

Ave Maria ~ with harp

Wednesday ...

This month so far has been a busy one, and my calendar is filled with wonderful events.

Click photos to enlarge.

   Last week I was gifted this beautiful partridge in a pear tree which is now brightening up the wall above my kitchen sink.  It was made by the mother of one of my church family members, and I love it!

    We had two Christmas craft markets in town on Saturday and I indulged and purchased this juniper wreath for my living room wall.  I love the simple beauty of it.  The artist who created it was featured in the [link to click>] Greenbrier Valley Quarterly magazine.  But there were honestly so many AMAZING artists at both craft markets I wanted one of everything!

 

   Saturday evening was the Christmas parade in town, and I walked with our church floats inviting people to come to our children's Christmas plays.  We have so many kids in the church that we are having two plays!

   It was so much fun to walk in the parade, and since I also walked to the meet-up spot before it started and home at the end of the parade, I think I got all my steps in for the day (two miles in all)!

   I am in the top photo on the right, in the dinosaur Christmas sweater, my favorite for the moment.

   This Friday evening we are having a Christmas cookie exchange with the women's group at church, so I'll be posting on Saturday the cookies I made this week to bring with the recipe for one, and a link to the recipe for the other.

    The partridge art prompted me to be a little creative myself, and I have been making an "intentions" piece to hang in my office over my desk where I can see it all day.  I was just going to find images in magazines to clip out but then decided to get a little creative and experiment with watercolors and salt.

     It is so wonderful to have hope, and to be able to write about much more than my health "adventures."

Thursday ...

     My silence lately has been simply because I've been busy, with not a lot to share.

     After doing some unintentional aerobics inside and outside of the house which involved quickly putting up a temporary chicken wire fence to keep Charlie from charging visiting dogs next door, stepping in a hidden "gift" he left under leaves, realizing after I'd come back into the house that the gift was attached to the bottom of my boot, hopping on one foot back through the house to remove my boots outside... I was finally able to relax and watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade with Gracie.

     In the spring I plan to "train" the wild growing ivy to use the chicken wire fence as support so that it eventually will look like an ivy covered wall.  That is my intention at least, to make it look less rednecked and more natural.  I also recently found out that I can rake my leaves out to the road and the city will pick them up, tho it may be too late in the season for me to do that this year, I will calendar it for next year.  

 

    I put up my Christmas "tree" with some origami ornaments I made last year with cards I received, including one from my mom.  All of the ornaments have sentimental attachments to trips or people, and I think this is my favorite tree ever.

    We've had some cold and frosty days, but thankfully no snow as yet.  Still, Charlie has insisted on his little corduroy jacket for some walks. 

     On the health front, the news is good.  A last-minute appointment at the oncologist's office for blood work returned results that were as normal as the setting on a washing machine.  He has not yet commented on the latest CT images, but I'm not going to wait on his confirmation that I have no cancer.

     Four months ago I was planning on sending "good-bye/thank you for having been in my life" cards at this time.  Instead, I am praising God for his healing mercies and grace and sending Christmas cards.  God is good.  All the time.

Alcohol Ink Baubles

    If you do a search on YouTube for Alcohol Ink Art, you will find I'm sure a good number of tutorials to watch.  I included one of them in a blog post a few days ago.  However, if you have the chance to find someone to teach it, I strongly suggest doing that.  The fun is in the laughter and in the ooohs and aaahhs at each other's creations.

     Above all, safety first.  Work in a well-ventilated room because of the fumes from the alcohol.

   There are a few different techniques, and what I found worked best for me was putting alcohol on the paper (or ornament) first, then the color.  From there, you can wait for it to dry before adding another color with a drop or two of alcohol or put the second color on before the first (and alcohol) dries.  Note:  one drop of ink goes a long way, and if you are heavy-handed with your drips and drops, it can take longer to dry.

    Since I was making four different balls, I practiced with my color schemes on the paper first, finding what I liked most.

    You can buy the alcohol inks, and metallic inks, individually or as sets.  For the purpose of ease, and because I couldn't get Michael's website to cooperate, I'll add links here of examples I found on Amazon.  However, you can ask at your local art supply store also.  The brands I've included links for are simply suggestions of what to look for, not necessarily what we used.

    You may also want to work over disposable puppy piddle pads to absorb any drips and drops that will happen to keep you from getting the inks all over everything that you don't want to be inked (like clothes, furniture, carpet, nosy cats).

1.  [Non-absorbent /non-porous paper] Yupo is a brand name that the instructor suggested, but any paper specifically designed for alcohol inks will work.  You can also use these to make cards, or prints to hang.  We used the paper to practice techniques first.

2.  Ideas for what to decorate:

• We used glazed ceramic ornament balls.  You can also use matte ones.  Be sure to take out the metal topper before starting to paint.
• Plain white coffee mugs, Since they are sealed with a spray varnish (more on that farther down) I would probably tape around the rim while painting and sealing it to keep the inks and varnish off the lip edge. 
• Flat ornament discs (you can put a name or message on the reverse side with a Sharpie pen, which I would do first and bake it to set the pen ink.)
• Square ceramic tiles (think coasters or trivets).  
• You could probably also use clear glass balls.  A cousin asked about plastic ornaments, and they would probably work, just not be as vibrant.  It would be interesting to try to do interior paint on a clear glass ornament, maybe a very thin layer of alcohol on the inside, then put in drops of metallic paint to roll until dry before layering a little more alcohol and colors on top of that.
• I would not use anything that will be used to serve food (such as a plate) unless it is going to be strictly decorative. 
  

3.  91% or higher proof alcohol.  I did ask if vodka could be used, but the jury is still out on that, and if you decide to use vodka, use the cheap stuff.  Drink the good stuff.

4.  Alcohol inks, such as [this set of colors] or [this set of metallics] is just a suggestion.  You can also buy them individually if you like, however, there is more fun in multiple colors.

5.  After they were dried, everything (paper and ornaments) was sprayed with a light coat of [Krylon Kamar Varnish].

   We had set them upside down in florist foam bars to dry and set while being sprayed.  It made it easy to handle them, and one of the women actually used the foam bar to hold them while she decorated them.

   We had the option of wearing disposable gloves, but I think everyone discarded theirs after a while.  The ink can be messy, but it comes off fingers and skin easily with a little bit of alcohol.

    It was a super fun project, and I have a feeling it will be one I do again!

Wednesday ...

One of the local florist shops, Gillespies, still has some HUGE
pumpkins for sale in front of their shop!

   Yesterday I walked (0.6 miles uphill) to the clinic for a CT Scan to check my lymph nodes and see if they had changed since July's scan.  It was a chilly morning in the low 40s which made the slight incline of the walk a little more comfortable.  We still have some fall leaves on the trees, so it was a beautiful walk, there and back, tho I will admit the downhill walk home was at a faster pace and warmer.

  The scan did not show any significant change in size, which I didn't find surprising or disturbing.  I was sick for most of the year.  I doubt that they will change overnight since I am still purging some of the stress that caused all this in the first place.  They will repeat the scan in another six months.

  One positive note is that my A1C count for diabetes has significantly dropped by 4 points, and I'm claiming to be free of it by the beginning of the year.

  I made a stop at the Greenbrier Christmas Depot on the way back, which was my whole reason for wanting to walk in the first place.  They are still unpacking their new 2021 decorations, but there was more than enough to keep my good eye busy.  Imagine four more rooms filled floor to ceiling with decorations, ornaments, and holiday table settings.  It was beautiful.

   I also stopped into the above-mentioned florist whose interior theme has moved on from fall pumpkins to Christmas.  They had some beautiful decorations and ornaments also and this year were selected to do all of the decorations for the Greenbrier Resort.  I'm going to plan on getting in there one weekend before Christmas to take pictures.  I'm sure it will be stunning!

   These snowmen versions of Russian dolls were just adorable, and they had some beautiful blue porcelain ornaments that were stunning.  They would look amazing on a white tree!

Monday ...

   Saturday morning was cold, windy, and cloudy.  Appropriate for a 6-hour women's conference at church with the theme of Loving the Cloudy Days.  It was indeed an amazing day, and I was exhausted but spiritually filled when I got home that afternoon.

  On Sunday, sandwiched between two church services, I attended a baptism for a friend and a young girl on a very chilly 42F early afternoon.  It was a good day, a very good day.

   Wednesday this week is my hopefully last CT Scan to determine the status of my lymph nodes.  If they have returned to "normal" (whatever that is) then I will be declared truly cancer-free.  

  On Saturday, I will be spending some time making [alcohol ink baubles] (<click link to video) for myself and my sisters, and am quite excited about doing them.  I can't wait to share pictures!

   We have also decided to do a Christmas cookie exchange this year with an international flair.  I'm making German cookies ~ Springerle and a twist on Spritz:  cranberry cheesecake Spritz ~ in honor of my mom and her parents.  My sister, Kat, will soon receive my stone shortbread mold so she can make Scottish shortbread in honor of her Dad.  Our other sis, Heather, will be making Italian Christmas cookies in honor of her in-laws.  Yummmm!

Nov-versaries ...

  ... and being okay with not being "okay."

  It's hard to believe that I've been in West Virginia now for almost a full year.  What a year it has been, too.  I thought 2020 was the pits, but 2021 outdid it.  

    I started 2021 thinking that my word of the year was going to be "create."  To create a new life after 2020 and ten years of living with a closet meth-addict-alcoholic-narcissistic-gas-lighting-abuser.  

  I had a dream in the spring of opening an indi-book shop on Main Street to help indi-authors promote their books and encourage wannabe writers.  That dream was shelved by early summer when my health suddenly took a nosedive in the deep end of the whattheheckisgoingonwithme pool.

    Instead, I think my word quickly became "recover."  This year has been all about recovering from those ten years in the deep end of the stress pool, swimming with insanity.  Ten years of acting brave when I was terrified.  Ten years of struggling for jobs, food, places to live, utilities.  Ten years of losing everything again and again and again.  Ten years of losing myself.

  Anyone who thinks that stress (work, home, life, whatever) doesn't take a physical toll on you needs to think again.  The physical act of my body purging all of that ... not something I would wish on anyone.  Ever.

  Less than five months ago, I wasn't even sure I was going to see the end of the year after being told by an oncologist that I had stage four colon cancer that spread to my liver and lymph nodes.  I was planning for my death, making arrangements for my furkids to find new homes.  Planning on sending goodbye letters instead of Christmas cards.

  Anyone who thinks that planning for your own death doesn't take an emotional and mental toll on you needs to think again.

  Every morning that I wake up, I am blessed and amazed.  Every night I climb into bed, I am blessed and amazed.  There is nothing I take for granted now.  Not my health.  Not my family.  Not my friends.

  But I also know that it's okay to say that I'm not "okay."  This year has been so hard for me, and I recognize that a part of me is broken.

  The 18th marks the beginning of my season of rebirth from that recovery.  It will be a year since my divorce.  A year since I left Wisconsin to start life over again somewhere I had never been before, somewhere with no friends or family waiting to greet me.  It will be 56 days since the surgeon confirmed I did not have colon cancer.  Forty-seven days since biopsies confirmed I did not have liver cancer.  Just over a month since my mom died and another fight with my brother severed ties between us forever.  

  I'm still waiting on a CT scan to confirm that my lymph nodes have returned to normal [now scheduled finally for the 17th].  But I am already getting counseling with BetterHealth online [<< click the link to get a free week] to talk to someone about not being "okay."  I have over ten years of unpacking some bottled-up emotions and PTSD.

  I'm not "okay" today.  But I will be.

Monday ...

clicking on the photos
will enlarge them

   It's my first fall here, and I've come down with a sinus issue from new pollens.  I should have been eating local honey since last year when I got here to build up immunities.  I was sick all weekend and took a half-day off work today, promptly falling asleep on the sofa for three hours.

   Tonight I've been watching a frightening new show on Hulu called "The Hot Zone."  Frightening because it is based on a true story about ebola in the Washington DC area.  Reminds me almost of when I was reading Stephen King's "The Stand" when I was working in a bank lending center during flu season.  I worked in a bay with 11 other people, six desks on each side plus the supervisor.  The flu traveled up and down the bays.  In the time of Covid-19, virus movies are the latest horror movies.

   I'm trying to eat new things occasionally, and as I mentioned last Thursday, I was gifted with some very green tomatoes.  Unfortunately, I waited too long to fry them and learned the hard way that fried green tomatoes have to be fried when they are very green and firm.  Otherwise, you get fried kinda red & green mush.

 

 Last weekend I picked up a pomegranate because they were really nice looking and it had been over 40 years since I had one.  Greek mythology used to be my thing back in the day, and I remember the story of Persephone and Hades and wouldn't eat any of the seeds.  I was in Florida at the time, and the last thing I wanted was to jinx us with a long winter.  This time, after a little research, I found out that eating the seeds is safe to do, and has some benefits.  Unfortunately, they are so woody-tasting that I couldn't eat them.  Grape-Nuts taste better and are easier to swallow.  Sawdust probably would be also. There will not be a long winter in West Virginia because of me.  But I will be adding pomegranate juice to my shopping list all the time now.  Just drinking over a cup every day has some amazing health benefits.

 

   I also got a free sample 4-pack of Heinekin's new "near-beer" ~ an alcohol-free version ~ to try this past week.  It was not bad, and I will probably buy it occasionally when I'm in the mood for a beer.   My drinking days are long past now, it's a good thing.

   Early this morning as I was getting ready to start my workday, I got a visit from a male cardinal that I've named Pip.  He usually sits in the trees outside the kitchen window, or when I have the bedroom curtains open he will sit in the trees there. I hear him talking to me and will say hello to him.  This morning he sat right outside the office window where I was able to see him clearly since the leaves have fallen.  They say that when a cardinal visits, it can be a visit from someone who has passed away.  This morning I wondered if it was Mom saying hello.

   Finally today, I'm sharing some artwork I got for free from Wish.com, paying only to ship them, to add to my office space's warped sense of humor since I share it with the cat boxes.   I may have to get some orange Sharpie pens and color the white one to match Gracie.  I once had a tuxedo cat named Oreo who liked to sleep in the bathroom sink and may need to put some white toes and a little white stripe down the forehead of this one before I get both of them put in frames and hung.

One last word for October ...

Domestic violence and abuse can happen in ANY relationship.  Not just between married couples.  But inside of families too.  Parents to children.  Children to parents.  Between siblings.  Between couples that are dating.  Couples that are living together.  Between co-workers.  Supervisors to subordinates.  Subordinates to supervisors.  

Any of the behaviors listed below are ABUSIVE and should not be tolerated.

Get help.  Whether you are the abused, or the abuser.  Get help.

October has been Domestic Violence Awareness month.  Violence and abuse are not always visible, and often the unseen bruises and scars (words, emotions, psychological) are the deepest.  

If you or someone you know is experiencing any type of abuse, there is help.  Please visit the [National Coalition Against Domestic Violence resources page].

Surfacing ...

    Death can sometimes draw families closer together.  But not always, and not all family members.  It can bring out the ugliness that we've chosen to ignore until there is no choice but to confront it and end it.  For our own safety and peace of mind.

    The last twelve days have been mind-boggling in the amount of unnecessary anger and hatred coming from one such family member.  And overwhelmingly sad in how much that person, and immediate family, will miss out on because of ties being severed as a result.

  Life is short.  Unmercifully so at times.  Fortunately, a family doesn't always have to be who we are born into, but who we choose to surround ourselves with.  For that, we can make healthier choices.

  I have to go back to my photos to remember what I've been doing lately.  Most of it has not been photo-worthy.  The weather has gotten cold, trees are changing color and losing their leaves.  On a recent cold, windy, and rainy day Lucy (birthday girl turned 5 on the 1st of October) had the fuzzy snuggle plan down pat.

   Last night at Bible Study I got some gorgeous green tomatoes, and plan on making fried green tomatoes as soon as I can get some breadcrumbs ... or may make some of my own with the last few pieces of whole grain bread I have.  I've never had fried green tomatoes, but remember that my Uncle Ron when he came to visit in Florida before my father died would want to go to a specific "hole-in-the-wall" local restaurant for theirs because they were the best he'd ever had.  I will think of him when making mine.

  A few weeks ago (before the recent drama llama) I went to a Farmer's Market in Lewisburg with a friend and got a beautiful pint of "Lion's Mane" mushrooms, and fresh basil.  The mushrooms I sliced, sauteed in butter, and devoured.  They had the taste and texture of lobster ... and much less expensive.  The basil I chopped and froze with olive oil to use later.

  With the colder weather, I'm keeping my toes warmer, running the thermostat a little lower to keep the bill down, and snuggling with the furkids on the sofa and in bed.  Now that my office has been moved upstairs, I think that it will be a much better winter for me and my toes.

   I did get some mums and Halloween decor put up, but not much.  This will be my first Halloween here, so I'm hoping for lots of little costumed trick-or-treaters to share photos of on Sunday.

   I'm also transitioning some of my plants from the kitchen window (coldest room in the house during the winter) to the office upstairs, and have been working on a mini signpost for my succulent garden.

   Healthwise ... I'm doing better.  I still need to get a new CT scan to check my lymph nodes before anyone says I'm cancer-free.  There were a few miscommunications on getting that done this month, but I'm claiming that by the end of the year I will be healthier than when I started the year, and cancer-free.

   I've made many new friends/family lately at church and with a creative artist group of people.  I'm so blessed by all of them.  I had signed up for a watercolor class before Mom passed with the intention of sending her the cards I made for Christmas, but instead just used the time to get out of my box and laugh.  November, however, will be some keeper projects including alcohol ink Christmas baubles, and another watercolor class.

Sibyl ...

   She was born 28 Sept 1941 in Detroit, Michigan area, the third daughter of Edward & Ruth.

   After she graduated high school, she married Rodger and began the life of a military officer's wife, moving about every two to four years.

    Her first daughter, (me!), was born in May 1962 when she was 21 years old, followed a year and a half later by her only son, Ken, in December 1963.

   She loved the years they spent in Germany, from 1969 to 1972.  In those years, she traveled to other countries with the Officer's Wives Club, and as a family to places like Nice, France where she was able to meet a high school pen pal, Genevieve, and her family.  Salzburg, Austria.  Amsterdam, The Netherlands.

   Sibyl loved painting, taking watercolor, pastels, and charcoal classes.  Every year she would paint the front window of their apartment in Germany for Halloween and Christmas.  She also loved to sew, and would often sew clothes for me, and matching dresses for the two of us.  She loved volksmarches and the opportunities they offered to see more towns and countrysides in Germany, and German wine and food.

  In 1977, she and Rodger divorced in Florida, and later that year, she married Eric, becoming a stepmother to Heather, and in January 1980, mother to a second daughter, Kat.

  She, Eric, and Kat moved to Scotland in 1984 where she began another love of hers ... cooking and entertaining.  Sibyl ran the Old Bridge Inn pub, and later a fish farm shop at a privately owned estate in Aviemore with fresh and smoked fish for sale and an assortment of gifts.  After they moved to Poolewe, she ran the Corriness Pub & Restaurant for several years where she made some of her "American" favorite meals to serve the unsuspecting Scots.

  Sibyl and Kat returned to the United States in 1994 following her divorce from Eric.  Eventually, they settled in Mocksville, North Carolina where she remained until her death on 16 October 2021.

   She became active with a church and loved sending thoughtful greeting cards to her family, friends, and church members.  She had a kind heart with a smile that would brighten any dark day, a hearty laugh, a good sense of humor, and was loved by everyone.  She never met a stranger who didn't quickly become a friend.  More than once when she lived in Scotland, she would entrust a traveling tourist with gifts to mail to me once they returned to the states.

   Waiting to greet her upon her arrival in Heaven were her parents, an older sister Sue, younger brother Brian, and many people she loved in her life.

   She is survived by her companion kitty Pepper; her sister, Nancy; me and my furkids; Ken, his wife Jo, and granddaughters Tammy (mother is Sandra) and Abi (mother is Jo); Kat, her hubs Luke, grandsons Ethan and Jordon; Heather, her hubs Robert, granddaughter Isabella; grandson Dan (mother is Joanne), a great-granddaughter Aura; and too many nieces and nephews to list.  

   Mom will be missed greatly by everyone who knew her, and by those who hadn't yet been blessed by her presence.  A small memorial will be planned for her birthday in 2022 to scatter her ashes.  If you wish to honor her memory before then, please donate to a local cat rescue organization.

Snug as a Bug in a Rug

   I use, and highly recommend, an app on my phone called [Snug Safe] that is free to use, although they do have a paid plan if you want additional options.

   Essentially, it works to give seniors (actually anyone can use it) and their loved ones a sense of security.  I would also highly recommend it for any person who lives in a potentially dangerous situation ~ like someone in a domestic violence situation.  It's also perfect for someone who may be disabled and is alone for part of the day, for example, if their significant other works during the day or at night.  

    There are so many different scenarios where it can be used.  College students away from home and living in a dorm.  People who work in a building where they are the only ones on the floor or in the building.  Any time or place where someone feels they need that extra sense of security either for themselves or someone they care about. I use it mostly because of my health issues this year, and the fact that I have diabetes.

   You set the time you want to check-in, and if you miss that check-in time, they will (free) send an email to your emergency contact letting them know you've missed your check-in.  They can also (paid) give you a call to make sure you are okay, and send someone to check on you if you need it, or don't respond to the call.

   You can pause it for a time if you are going on to be away from your phone, or with other people who can help if you need it.

    We've determined that my mom died sometime Saturday based on where she was found and what she was wearing.  She last spoke to her friend, Judy, on Friday night around 11p.  While Judy tried to call her several times during the day with no response, she didn't actually report her concerns to the senior living center's management until late Saturday night (no blame here, just facts).  

    I do not believe that she could have been saved if she had been found earlier.  But I do believe that if she had used Snug and missed her check-in, we would have been notified sooner and some of her end-of-life wishes could have been carried out as she had arranged them.  Instead, we had a last-minute scramble to find another body donation organization that was willing to take her because EMS (in error) reported her time of death as Friday night at 11p.  Pretty sure that if Judy heard her die while they were talking, she would not have waited 24 hours to get someone to check on her.

   Give yourself and the ones you care about a little extra hug ... and Snug.  You can download it from Google Play or any other app store you use.  This has not been a paid advertisement.  I'm just a very satisfied client.

Sunday & memories ...

 It has been a very difficult 72 hours.

Saturday morning I experienced the most intense pain I've ever felt in my life.  Ever.  on a 1-10 scale, probably a 50, tho I told people 20.  Curl up in a ball, scream, and ugly cry pain.  Who knew dehydration could be so painful.  I had lost 4.6# in fluids and night sweats Friday night and Saturday morning.  Leg and foot cramps.  Intestinal cramps.  Not something I would wish on even the universe's worst enemy.  When it finally dawned on me that drinking tap water wasn't helping, I had a friend take me to the pharmacy to pick up some electrolyte powders to replenish what my body had lost.  After 10 hours of drinking the mix in water, I was finally beginning to feel like I might survive late last night.

Then I got the call from my sister saying my mom had passed sometime Saturday of what they believe were natural causes.  Now I'm emotionally numb and still in physical pain.

These are some photos of my mom in no particular order.  She was the 3rd of four children, the youngest girl, with her little brother, Brian being the last.  The oldest and youngest of the four predeceased her, leaving just my Aunt Nancy now.  The last time I saw mom was in 2014 when I drove up to the Michigan Upper Peninsula.  We were better at writing than talking, and it had been several weeks since I had spoken to her.  I got a card from her for Halloween on Friday.  Bittersweet.

Above is from 2001 with my sister, Kat, at my brother's wedding weekend.