Words for Wednesday

  This Writing Challenge was started by Delores a long time ago. Computer issues led her to bow out for a while, and now Words for/on Wednesday is provided by a number of people around the world and has become a movable feast, with [Elephant's Child in Australia] acting as moderator.

   Essentially the aim is to encourage us to write. Each Tuesday or Wednesday (depending on time zones and hemispheres) we are given a choice of prompts: which can be words, phrases, music, or an image. What we do with those prompts is up to us: a short story, prose, a song, a poem, or ignoring them. We can use some or all of the prompts, and mixing and matching are encouraged.

   Some of us put our creation in comments on the post, and others post on their own blog. It is always wonderful if as many people as possible joined in this fun challenge, which includes cheering on the other participants.   You may post on Elephant's Child's blog, here, or your own blog.  If you are posting on your own blog - please share a link on Elephant's Child's blog or here so that I, and other participants, can come along and applaud.

   The Challenge:  They say a picture is worth 1,000 words.   Paint us a picture with at least 100 words of your favorite vacation spot.

harold

   First off, do you know how hard it is to find an appropriate image of poop without being gross?  One that doesn't have big eyes, a cute smile, or has a unicorn reference?  It's nearly impossible.  So be grateful I found this one and was able to wipe that silly grin off its face.

   I have read and heard that being able to "name" your cancer helps to focus your thoughts on eliminating it.  So meet harold, my colon cancer.  No capitalization, it's not important enough to me to be respected.

  A friend suggested I name it after my ex-husband (because he was a piece of poop), but calling it david just seemed too familiar and affectionate since that was the name (his middle) that he went by.  So harold, his first name, it is.

  I'm now taking applications for an appropriate name for my liver cancer that won't be offensive to write about, and that I can find a humorous image for that isn't alcoholic or Blake Lively related.  I was going to call it Ryan, for her husband Ryan Reynolds, who owns a gin company but felt that wanting to kill off Ryan was open to misinterpretation.  He is an actor who never fails to make me laugh, so it would be difficult to send cleansing thoughts to "Ryan" without laughing or thinking of a Deadpool joke of his.

stage 4

 The visit with the oncologist was positive, in spite of him telling me that he believes I have Stage 4 colon cancer that has spread to my lymph nodes and liver.  When he called me the afternoon before to find out how soon I could get the colonoscopy done, he told me that he felt I had cancer there also.

  My liver biopsy will be done as soon as possible, hopefully within the next two weeks, and also the PET scan.  He wants me to get started on chemotherapy before the end of September.

  As of right now, his plan of attack is to do chemo for about three months and then when the masses have reduced in size, do surgery to remove both masses at the same time.

  The doctor was honest with me.  It is rare that someone beats it at this stage.  But it has happened.  People have been cured.

   It will happen again.  I have a lot of people praying for me, and I believe in God's healing touch, and the power of prayer.  Even if healing me is not His will, I know I will be going home, and I will get to see Trooper again.  It is a win-win for me no matter what.

Tamarack

Friday morning I went to see the oncologist in Beckley.  It is about an hour's drive from here, and after the appointment, Nancy (my friend who drove me) and I went to [the Tamarack Center.]  It is a large art gallery featuring West Virginian artists.  It was amazing!

Turned wood.

Glasswork

Quilts and woodworking ~ I loved the deer prints on the fireplace mantle!

Stained glass

My door obsession

Stained glass, metalwork

Blown glass

Basket weaving

Glass paperweights and blown glass

Pottery

Lots of quilts

I was not aware that Fiestaware was made in West Virginia!

That pig!  I love that face!

Words on Wednesday ~ 8/25

This month, [David M Gascoigne] is providing the prompts for Words for Wednesday, but they are being hosted on [the Elephant's Child blog]. Started by Delores ages ago, it is now hosted by different people each month on various blogs around the world. The aim of Words for Wednesday is to encourage us to write using some or all of the prompts.

~*~

Image Source:
WeHeartIt.com

  When they were within 100 yards of Eahldun's tiny village, he asked her to stop and wait there. The underbrush was quite formidable and Alvina was worried that she might step on someone who was hiding beneath a leaf or plant that she couldn't see. As she stood there, waiting for him to come back and tell her what he found, she thought about the last 24 hours. Normally, Alvina was very reticent with her feelings having lived alone for so many years in her isolated house. But here she was, very close to tears for the second time that day, hoping against hope that the village and its community had somehow survived the attack.

  Her father had been a famous naturalist in his younger days and had taught her about the plants and animals in the area. But as she glanced around her, she realized that there were many plants and small insects that she had never seen before and wondered if they were part of that world she forgot as she became an adult.

  Alvina's mother, on the other hand, had come from what her father called a very hoity-toity family and had thought that by marrying a famous naturalist his fame would extend to her, something that her vain ego craved. The combination of the two produced only Alvina who had been more like her father than her mother could stand, and she would often exude such an unspoken dislike of her husband and child that they spent more time in nature than they did indoors.

  The strident criticism of her lead Alvina to indulge in copious amounts of sweets for a time in her youth, and if it had not been for her father's salient encouragement of her love of nature she might have been lost to depression. One day as a teenager, she finally had the temerity to stand up to her mother's cutting words and insulting euphemisms. At that moment everything for her changed.

  Not long after that day, Alvina's mother went to visit her parents. Happy to be able to be in the woods without having to feel guilty, it was almost a month before father or daughter even realized she had not returned from what was to have been a two-week visit. When her father called to inquire when she would be back, he was told never and to not contact her again. The fame and fortune she had imagined she would gain when she married him as a young girl had not materialized, and she had wasted her youth on him and her daughter. Now she was bitter and old, her resentment of the two making her as ugly outside as she was inside, and she was left with nothing but to care for her aging parents and hope for a sizeable inheritance.

  Alvina had not missed, or asked about, her mother again.

  Hearing something coming towards her in the underbrush, Alvina caught her breath and hoped that it was something small and not one of the large wild dogs that Eahldun had told her about. When she saw a long column of people and farm animals coming towards her, with Eahldun in the lead, she breathed a sigh of relief. It appeared everyone had survived, including Floria, although some with broken bones and other injuries.

  Eahldun had explained her offer of sanctuary to the community and they had unanimously agreed to accept. Gathering as much as they could each carry, and loading what they could on the backs of the farm animals, they had arrived at her feet with hope for the first time since the attack.

  The picnic basket she had brought to carry them out was barely large enough to fit everyone, and so she carried some on her shoulders, in her pockets, and those men who could walk lead the larger pack animals ahead of her with Eahldun leading the way back to her car.

  Glancing up as they exited the forest, Alvina felt her father smiling down upon her. She was about to begin the greatest adventure of her life.

color

  The weekend was a busy one.  Some things arrived in the mail, and other things were purchased.  

   One of the mailed items was these rubber step mats.  Because the steps are wood, and old, they become very slick when it rains or ices over during the winter.  More than once I have almost slipped and broken a tailbone, something I would really rather not do.  The mats give a little more gripping power and when it ices over, I can salt them and know that it will stay better.

   To make sure that even they did not slip, I nailed them down, including the larger half-circle.

   I've been keeping a calendar book of the daily average highs and lows temperature-wise, and items of note for the seasons, such as my electrical KWH usage so I can see when I need to be a little more mindful.  Lessons learned ... such as putting the ice salt in a covered bucket instead of leaving the bag itself outside the door where it can be easier accessed.  Last winter it must have rained one night and so I wound up with a huge block of frozen ice salt.

   I was also able to finally get a plant stand for outside the front door that I had been looking for.  As you can see, the rescued sedum is quite happy, and I wish that the peony roots I bought and planted would be just as happy.  Maybe after they have been in the ground for a year.  Out of the five, one grew and will come back stronger in the spring.  One was a maybe, and three just disappeared, so I have to assume they have died.

   I've ordered some small fairy lights to put on the tree, and hope that by the time winter comes, it will be weather hardy.  I had bought it last year as my Christmas tree for the kitchen window.  It is a small cypress something shrub.  The wood sorrel below it may or may not be winter hardy, but if not, I will find another perennial to plant in the pot next spring.  The vine growing up the wall is white morning glory, a volunteer.

  Also arrived were some wine cork(ish) fairy lights I ordered for some colored bottles in the kitchen window.  My winter hygge lights.  They are battery-operated and will be on when I am doing some planned Christmas baking.  I have a designed shortbread stone baker and want to try some recipes this fall to send to my sisters.

   Christmas baking is high on my wannado list this year.  I have a patterned rolling pin that I bought in Germany on my first river cruise in 2007.  It will make some beautiful Springerle cookies!  I also have some loaf pans with Thanksgiving and Christmas-themed tops (bottom of the pan) and don't know if I could do a shaped Stollen bread in them since it is not usually a shaped bread but more like a fold and flop.  But a quick search does show one image in a pan so it could be doable.

  I also received the new ornament display tree I found affordably priced.  It is not as tall as the last one I had, so some of my September ornaments are big on it.  I might see if I can find an affordable full-sized one I can put in the living room, and then use this one in my office and find smaller ornaments that will fit its size.

   My leaf platter of rocks are some I collected in the UP and Wisconsin along Lake Superior's shoreline.  Agates.  Geodes.  Ones that called out to me.

   On the health front, everything is a waiting game again.  But I've decided to go down fighting ...

travel back in time with me...

My brother recently sent me these.  He is apparently going through the slides of my dad's.  I've never seen any of them before, and they are quite the treasures.

From left:  me, cousin Sharon, cousin Steve, and my younger brother, Ken.
This would have been taken in San Diego, California, prior to 1969.

This one must have been my first pair of glasses.  Or my first home perm by mom.
Either way, I was very unhappy to be in front of the camera.

Ken and I (I'm trying to hide the home perm).

I was apparently a very serious child at times.  This was taken on our balcony at our apartment in Wiesbaden, (West) Germany sometime between 1969 and 1972.  Oddly enough, I think it is my most favorite photo of myself that I've ever seen.

This would have been my joy at finishing my first Volksmarch.  Or eating a German bread roll (Brötchen).  There would have been a Bratwurst in it with brauner Senf (brown mustard), and we would have had pommes frites (French fries) too.  It was the best part of a Volksmarch.

This must have been a new coat.  I don't remember it at all and am not sure if it was store-bought or one made by my mother.  She sewed a lot of my clothes for a while when I had to wear twister-cables on my legs and orthopedic shoes for a year.

Saturday

   I had blood drawn (three vials) yesterday for tests that the cancer center requested.  One of the tests ~ for a tumor marker ~ came back already within the normal range, but according to the results could not be relied upon to indicate that there is (or is not) a tumor.  Prior authorization requests have been submitted for the PET scan and a CT-guided liver biopsy.   The surgeon here does not feel that the location in my liver they need to biopsy can be accessed surgically.  It will be done at a hospital in Beckley where they have an interventional radiologist, and the cancer center, also in Beckley, will coordinate it.

   Things have become very real, and also very surreal.  I was quite emotional yesterday for a short time, then got angry at the amount of control I was giving this *thing* in my liver over my life.  Yes, the facts are that because my lymph nodes are involved, there is a "possible" 12% chance of being able to enjoy another five years of life.  There, I said it.

Image Source:
WeHeartIt

   But nothing is written in stone, and as my sister wrote on a stone ... even they can change.

   I was reminded by a friend in Texas that I am stubborn.  I have faced "worse" ~ maybe not in the same type of situation ~ but I have faced and overcome other challenges.  This *thing* is not going to define me or beat me.  No matter the outcome, even if I'm not one of that 12%, I'm still a winner because I am taking back control of my life and I'm going to live ~ or die ~ on my terms.

   Sherah, my inner Amazon, Queen of the Parking Lot, has spoken.

    [a long story involving a stalker I had some 40+ years ago, and advice that an off-duty police officer/part-time store security gave me ... attitude is everything.]

Words on Wednesday ~ 8/18

 This month, [David M Gascoigne] is providing the prompts for Words for Wednesday, but they are being hosted on [the Elephant's Child blog]. Started by Delores ages ago, it is now hosted by different people each month on various blogs around the world. The aim of Words for Wednesday is to encourage us to write using some or all of the prompts.

~*~*~

Alvina rubbed the tears from her blurry eyes after Eahldun had finished telling her of his travels and not knowing whether or not his family and friends were safe.

"Are you hungry, Eahldun?  I have some fresh figs in the house and cold water to drink."

"Yes, please.  I would like that very much."

She walked with him on her shoulder until they entered the house, then set him on the floor, leading the way to the kitchen.  "I'm not sure I have a small enough glass for you to drink from, and I never developed any sewing skills, so I wouldn't have a thimble.  My mother always tried to teach me needlepoint, but I was such a tomboy growing up that I would rather spend my time in the trees instead of stitching them on fabric."

Eahldun laughed, "My little sister is like that.  Mother wants her to learn skills that will help when she marries, but Floria would rather spend all her time playing in the field flowers.  Father never should have given her a name that meant a flower in bloom.  She tells mother that she has no time for marriage, it was just for oversexed old men anyway and she didn't want any part of it."

"Do you think she survived the attack?  You must be so afraid for your family and friends.  The not-knowing would be just intolerable for me."

"I don't know.  I've been afraid of what I will find if I go back.  Right now, I can tell myself that they escaped as I did and are still alive."

"But wouldn't they be searching for you?"

He sighed, "Yes, I suppose they would be."

Alvina looked at him thoughtfully as she placed a plate with small pieces of fig, and a spoon full of water next to him on the table where he had climbed up so that they could talk while she prepared the fig.

"You, your family and friends, would all need to find a new home, yes?  One that did not have a glacial winter season?"

"Yes, I'm sure we would.  Why?"

"I was just thinking that my garden might be the perfect place for all of you to have a new home.  I mean, I have a fenced yard that keeps out dogs and most of the larger wildlife that can't climb it.  Our winters are cold here, but we could build small shelters that would keep you warm.  You could tend to the garden for food, and if there was anything else you needed, I could provide it."

"You would do that for us?"

Slowly nodding, "Yes.  I think it would be lovely to have all of you in my garden, to have your company, and to learn more about the magic that goes on in the world that I've forgotten since I grew up.  I've enjoyed my solitude here, and don't miss having a romantic interest.  But just in talking with you, I've realized that I miss having that.  Conversations.  I would not be the most dogmatic landlord, I assure you.  I think it will be a win-win for both of us.  If you'd like, after you've refreshed yourself, I could drive you back to your valley to search for survivors."

Two hours later, following the directions Eahldun was giving her, Alvina stopped on a dirt road that looked down into a smaller valley with a soft, nebulous glow.  She followed him, carefully picking her way through the underbrush, with a large picnic basket in her arms, ready to carry any wounded to the safety of her car.  Chewing a piece of gum to hide her nervousness and fear, Alvina hoped that she had made the right choice by offering her garden as a sanctuary to Eahldun and his people.

She wondered if there were also elf-sized cows, sheep, and pigs, and what type of fodder they ate.  Whether there were chickens and ducks and tried to imagine their tiny eggs.  There was so much that she didn't know, and one thing that she always deprecated in herself was ignorance.

Lucy scan

   I learned something new today, something fascinating, and I love to learn fascinating new things.

   Dr. K consulted with a Beckley, WV cancer center about referring me to them, and they suggested getting a PET scan done and more bloodwork locally first.   

   I've never had a PET scan and found some information and [a video that was very informative.]  I never knew the difference between all of them!

   The biopsy is on hold until after the consult with the cancer center.  If after they see the PET scan they still want one done, then I think that will be done locally.

Gracy (L) & Lucy (R)

   I'm still trying to find a potential future home for the cats.  One other thing to check off on my ducks in a row list.  They are mother and daughter and must go as a matched set.

   Not that I'm anticipating a negative outcome, but I'm a Murphy's Law kind of planner.  If I carry my umbrella around with me everywhere, I won't need it.  If I forget it one day, that will be the day it rains.  I've walked in the rain a lot.

   Both girls lately have been competing for lap time with me.  Some weekends, they both curl up on my lap.  Gracie used to just want to sit by my side, but now, even when I'm working (trying to work) she wants to sit on my lap.  Lucy was never a lap hugger before.  I have to believe that they are trying to heal me.  I read once that a cat's purr is at the same frequency as an ultrasound wave to help broken bones heal.

  The beast went away today and was a little heartbreaking for me.  It was a good truck, and it got me through two winters in Wisconsin, and the drive to West Virginia.  I'm grateful for it.  Kinda sad that some of the window decals are gone and will be challenging to replace, but I may just see what my next vehicle's personality is before buying more.

   I apologize for not responding individually to comments lately in a timely fashion.  Some days I'm just at a loss for words, which is odd for me.   The Words on Wednesday storyline I just started last week will continue at least until September, maybe longer.  I'm providing the prompts in September so it will be interesting to see if I can incorporate them into the story.

   If you will continue to keep me in prayers, I will continue to be forever grateful. 

sunday

  I found this branch in the vacant lot next door and was going to spray paint it and bring it in for an ornament tree in my living room.  But then realized that some of the smaller branches might not have the strength to hold up some of the ornaments.  After keeping it on my patio for a few days, I sort of liked the look of it there and have been hanging some found feathers and butterfly wings on it.

  As soon as the fall colors start to pop, I'll be ironing some leaves into wax paper and hanging them as well.  

  Spiders have set up residence in the birdhouse, and I'm hoping that they will like the branch better.  I was hoping that one of the Carolina wrens will choose the birdhouse in the spring.

   The truck will be gone on Tuesday evening, and I have mixed feelings.  I've been without vehicles before, and walking is a good thing for me.  It's another step to closing that other chapter of my life, and opening a chapter of possibilities for a new2me vehicle with no ugly history to it.

  Waiting for insurance to approve the liver biopsy.  It seems that life is an endless waiting game sometimes.

in other news ...

Lucy Magillicutty

It has been an interesting week with at least one of us getting enough sleep.

After looking at the costs to get my truck on its feet (so to speak) and in a passable inspection status, I came to the conclusion that it was not going to be financially feasible.  

Tires alone after mounting and balancing would be roughly $600.  The windshield has a crack and needs to be replaced, which insurance will cover after a deductible of $75, however, before they will replace it, the rust along the top of the windshield frame will need to be sanded and welded so there are no leaks.  That could cost anywhere from $1000 to $2500.

Ouch.  I only paid $1500 for the truck, and it probably wasn't worth that.  It is a 1999 Chevy Tahoe, and every time I slammed the back doors closed a piece of the door rust fell off.  Years in Michigan's Upper Peninsula and in Wisconsin, long winters, snow, ice salt ... I'm still just so grateful that it got me here before the tires decided to blow.  I decided to sell it for scrap and bank the money I'll get for it (just a third of what I paid) for another used vehicle.

Or not ...

The MRI results were finally sent, and my doctor called to discuss them with me this afternoon.  It was not good news, but let me go back in time for a moment first...

I think I mentioned a post or two before during this adventure that I've had a hemangioma on my liver for probably decades.  It has given me elevated levels in some blood tests.  Doctors have run the test again to confirm it, then done an ultrasound and told me that it was a harmless hemangioma ~ a weird cluster of blood vessels ~ and not to worry about it.  The last ultrasound was done in 2019 in Wisconsin and the tech noted that it was 1.7 cm.

So I haven't worried about it, especially after breaking out a centimeter to inches conversion app and figuring out it was a little bit more than half an inch big.  It wasn't growing, even though my test numbers were slowly climbing.  I would forget about it until the next time it showed up on a blood test and got used to pooh-poohing it away.  It's nothing, I'd tell them, just weird old Mangi.  No need to worry.  Had it for decades.

Only this time, instead of doing an ultrasound, the CT radiologist who saw it said maybe we should do an MRI.  Just to be sure.  There's never been one done before, what the heck.  She's got insurance.  They'll pay for it (and to be clear, I had insurance all the other times too).

The weirdo is now 4cm by 6 cm, and without a biopsy (yet) to confirm, has a high probability of some type of cancer or malignancy.

There you have it.  The six-lettered C-word.  In the left lobe of my liver.  I'm waiting now to find out when a biopsy can be scheduled.  Colonoscopy has been put on pause (which honestly, I and my colon are grateful for), and I'm taking things one day at a time.

I tried to find some liver humor on WeHeartIt to just be able to throw a bit of levity in this post, but everything was either about alcoholics or Blake Lively, and I'm not really sure how she even compares to the livers of alcoholics.

Tho, her hubs, Ryan Reynolds is a co-owner of Aviation American Gin, I'm sure that is only a slim very remote connection to the livers of alcoholics. (Just kidding, Ryan, all the alcoholics I knew liked Bud Light).

Both of them are clearly gorgeous people, and I've heard that they are also very gracious and generous: helping indigenous youth with a mentorship program; homeless youth; the hungry; and hospitals.

Who am I to complain if my weirdo liver is compared to them?

Words on Wednesday ~ 8/11

Image Source:
WeHeartIt.com

This month, [David M Gascoigne] is providing the prompts for Words for Wednesday, but they are being hosted on [the Elephant's Child blog]. Started by Delores ages ago, it is now hosted by different people each month on various blogs around the world. The aim of Words for Wednesday is to encourage us to write using some or all of the prompts.

~*~*~

Alvina was aghast as she looked over her flower garden.  Someone had come in and destroyed ... she turned quickly.  There was something that sounded like a snivel coming from behind the tree.

"You there," she shouted, "hiding behind that tree!  Come out or I shall shoot you where you stand!  Are you the creep that destroyed my beautiful garden?"

A small cry and a tiny voice responded, "Please, Miss.  I beg you to be magnanimous.  I had nothing to do with it.  I was just trying to catch a little bit of sleep before my travels again."

"Sleep?  In MY garden?  I shall frogmarch you down to the police station and charge you with trespassing!  Come out immediately!"

There was a rustling sound and to her surprise, a tiny man, no taller than half a foot stepped out from behind the tree.  Alvina took a step backward, feeling as if someone was trying to spoonfeed her a not-so-funny prank.  She looked around for hidden cameras.

"Is this some kind of a Candid Camera prank?  Who are you?  WHAT are you?"

"My name is Ealhdun.  I live or rather lived, in the valley by your city Roanoke.  I am an elf.  If you don't mind, and I promise you no harm, it would be so much easier for me to explain if you allow me to sit on your shoulder so that I don't have to scream to be heard.  I'm quite thirsty after last night's scare and my throat is sore already."

She looked at him cautiously before nodding her head, "Just so you know, if you do harm me, I shall tie you up in a knot you will never be able to untie.  I'm not quite sure I believe in elves, and that you are real and not a sleep-walking dream."  Bending, she allowed him to step onto her hand and then to her shoulder.

"I assure you this is no dream.  Elves do exist, and many other beings that humans cannot see or hear because of their unbelief.  Some part of you must believe, otherwise, we would not be able to have this conversation."

"Well, I'll be the judge of what I believe or don't believe.  Now tell me what happened to my garden before I drop imaginary you into the compost bin."

Ealhdun told her about the wild dogs that had sniffed out his village and gone into a frenzy chasing anything that moved and snapping them up in the air like they were some kind of toy.  He had managed to escape by slipping into a tunnel wicket too small for them to be able to get their snouts in.  Still, he had wriggled as far back into the tunnel as he could go, until there was no more visible light and he could no longer hear the screams of his family.

after midnight ...

My co-worker, Lucy, trying to sleep on the job.

 ... and I wish it was [just the song] running through my mind and not the fact that I'm still awake with other things on my mind.

  Friday's MRI went without complications, and I was hoping to get the results yesterday (Monday) but did not hear from my doctor.

  The colonoscopy has been scheduled for the 20th, and surprisingly a follow-up appointment has already been set for the 31st.  I'm trying not to read too much into the scheduling of a follow-up appointment with the surgeon and not with the physician's assistant that did the initial consult.  I've had colonoscopies in the past and my results were always delivered by phone or snail mail.  But then again, they weren't done because of enlarged lymph nodes on a CT scan, which I'm sure the surgeon has reviewed by now.  I just hope that he's not going to introduce himself the same way the GYN did by talking about radiation giving me the best options.

  Waiting in limbo for answers is the worst place.  Even worse than the diagnosis.  I feel like my life is on hold and I just want to be able to move forward.  I've been putting a face on lately when I'm going out in public for appointments, and it has been an interesting change for me.  I've noticed that when I wear makeup, I feel healthier, more alive.  I'd put on a face for working at home, but since I've not been sleeping well lately it is hard to get motivated for that.  In the past week, I've applied for two local office jobs, and will see how that goes.  As much as I love working from home, it can be very isolating.  Especially now when I feel that I need to stop being so isolated.  I need a bigger local support group.  Nancy has been amazing by giving me rides to and from doctor appointments.  Annie, willing to lend me her car for errands.  Neighbors across the street helping with the flat tire, and offering help.

  Churches here are about to go back on lockdown, I think.  I listened to an Episcopal service this past Sunday where they talked about going back to social distancing and masking as the Delta variant is gaining momentum.  I think, especially being at higher risk right now, watching online services will be my Sunday routine for a while.

  Rain is forecast for the rest of the week, and I truly hope we get it.  It has been so dry here that even the trees are wilting.  If I don't cut my gladiolus as soon as they start to bloom they wither and die without even showing much color.  If I had an outside water faucet, I'd set up drip lines for my front gardens.  Of the five peonies I planted, I think only one of them will survive, and my rose bush has died even with me watering it.  I've set out water bowls for the birds and smaller animals.  One of the creeks that I cross on my walk into town has completely dried up.  What we need is a slow, steady, refreshing rain.  Not gully-washers, just consistent.

   Limbo makes my mind race for things to do.  One of them this past weekend was getting some pictures I had blown up framed and hung on the entry wall by the door.  I couldn't think of what to put up then finally decided to put up doors, appropriately enough.  Some of the doors and entryways that I photographed when I went on my trips to Europe years ago.   Impossible to believe that it has been almost 14 years since I went.  And that long since my father died.

  I can't even comprehend that right now.

One down...

 ... three (or more) to go.

The GYN biopsies came back clean and clear.  I'm waiting now for my mammogram results, and expect that they will also be clean and clear.  Tomorrow morning is the colonoscopy consult to get it scheduled.  Friday morning is the MRI of my liver.

Words on Wednesday ~ 8/4

This month, [David M Gascoigne] is providing the prompts for Words for Wednesday, but they are being hosted on [the Elephant's Child blog]. Started by Delores ages ago, it is now hosted by different people each month on various blogs around the world. The aim of Words for Wednesday is to encourage us to write using some or all of the prompts.

~*~*~

  She wore her courage as if it was a peacock's plumage.  On most days, she appeared sleek, and in control.  Tail feathers and colors down, going through each day as if nothing was wrong.  As if cancer was a word that only happened to other people.  Not her.

  But when her phone rang and the caller ID indicated it was one of her doctors, her courage and tail feathers flashed.  As if to warn that word that she was not willing to hear it.  Not willing to give in to the fear of it.

  She had grown up in a peripatetic childhood.  Such was the life of a military family.  It made it hard to develop close friendships, and the ones that she had, were built upon the backs of the postal carriers.  Harder still was her connections to extended family, and there were times when she watched from a distance the closeness of her cousins with a slight pang of agony at what she had missed out on.

  Her divorce and move to another state had given her a bit more permissive desire to make friends and reconnect with family.  Even before her body had turned against her.  Even before she had reached out on social media to ask that they pray for her.  Still, she sometimes felt it was her duty to silently face the battles before her.  Unwilling to open herself to the rejection and judgment she had experienced in the past by "friends."

  Life had once been colorful before *he* turned it dark.  She'd had friends, and her townhouse was more of a townhome, filled with laughter and comfort.  Without even knowing, she had created a hygge home where neighbors, friends, and even stray dogs felt safe to approach her when they needed solace.  The darkness was absent, cast out by the lightness of her heart.  She listened with some mastery to not just what was said to her, but what her empathic soul was telling her.

  *He* came to prey on her kindness.  But in spite of his darkness, she walked away, with the beauty of an orchid.

a remedial lesson ...

  As I was getting ready for bed late Friday night, with Charlie out taking care of his business, a scent wafted in the open back door and through the house.  "NO!" I yelled.  "Tell me you did NOT forget what happened when you got sprayed by the skunk in Wisconsin!!!"

  He did.  

  Trust me when I say that West Virginia summer skunk spray smells 1000 times worse than Wisconsin winter skunk spray.  He got three baths before the smell on him was somewhat tolerable, although because it was so close to the house, there was nothing I could do about still being able to smell it.  He wasn't happy that I wouldn't let him sleep on the bed with me that night, and took his pout to his office bed.

  A neighbor was able to get my flat tire off the truck, however, the cause of the flat was dry rot ~ most likely from winters in the Michigan Upper Peninsula and Wisconsin.  He pointed out that the three remaining tires all had dry rot, and that the drivers' side front was a blowout waiting to happen.  Because of that, I've made the decision to not drive the truck at all until I can afford to get four new tires at Walmart, and will just have it towed there when they have been purchased.

  The last thing I need is for that, or one of the others, to have a blowout while I'm on the highway going to a doctor's appointment, or my upcoming MRI.  I feel like a tire blowout at 70 mph is a little worse than cancer.  I am also immensely grateful and blessed that they did not go flat or have a blowout while I was driving from Wisconsin on multiple highways while towing a UHaul trailer.

  One of my friends will let me borrow her truck for my appointments, and another new friend (from my out-of-box leap) has offered to take me to and from my eventual-ever-pleasant-always-looking-forward-to colonoscopy.

  Onto other more pleasant topics.

  Last night my sisters and I were texting about recipes after discussing that using tomatoes to get the skunk smell off Charlie was ineffective and would only result in him smelling like a skunk that had bathed in tomatoes.  I had commented that I'd rather eat my tomatoes than waste them, and then added that I was currently looking at some magazine recipes I had torn out to add to my "wanna-try-this" binder.  The recipe at that moment was for grilled mushrooms panzanella with tomato vinaigrette.  Unfortunately, I can't link the actual magazine's recipe here, but promise to post it once I've tried it and decided it is a winner-winner keeper recipe.

  This is a photo of my current cookbook collection, which includes the rainbow-striped binder of recipes I tear from magazines to try.   Once tried, if they are keepers, they stay.  Otherwise, they get thrown away.  Most of my collection now is from a friend who sent me some she was downsizing, and a few I found for $1 at a thrift store.  My original collection was lost in Wisconsin.  I had been collecting cookbooks from places I visited, and one of them seen here from The Double Musky Inn, I was able to purchase again.  It was a restaurant I ate at in Alaska when visiting my cousin.  Cookbooks I found are more fun and functional for vacation souvenirs than coffee mugs or t-shirts.

   I'll need to get another George Foreman grill to make the panzanella recipe.  There is also a recipe I found for savory cheddar waffles to make as a toast or muffin option for a fried egg breakfast sandwich, so a waffle maker is also now on my Amazon & Walmart wish lists waiting for decent sale prices.

  I miss having reasons to do a lot of cooking and baking.  Living alone I don't usually cook fancy for me, but the waffles I could make in advance and freeze, then toast when wanted.  I need to think more along those lines.